I suppose I could take advantage of the blizzard blowing outside my back door to catch up on a semester's worth of news...but apparently I'd rather lie on the couch and read a novel. Anyway, I think it's going to take a few more days before I stop feeling....feeling what? Can you feel anxious and numb at the same time? I've been living five minutes at a time for so many weeks, now that I am healthy enough to look *at least* ten minutes into the future, it would appear that I've forgotten how. Hopefully, a few more days of couch time will sort that all out. Not kidding, I just realized I was sitting here in my chair, rocking back and forth like the autistic child from the ABC After School Special. Truly whack, I am.

Signs that I've been seriously out of touch this semester: I had a paper due yesterday at 2:00. 48-hours before that, two of my e-mail accounts starting sending me automatic reminders: "Travel Paper Due, 2:00, 12/14/07." Yesterday morning at 8:30, I heard strange music coming from the office. I came upstairs to find my cellphone playing a tone I'd never heard before, and flashing an announcement at me: "Travel Paper Due 2:00! Travel Paper Due 2:00!"

The thing is, I didn't even know my phone could do that. I mean, I know I can set a basic alarm, but I can make it remind me of due dates, too? I had no idea. Even worse, I have absolutely no recollection of setting up those auto-reminders in not one, but two, e-mail accounts. Obviously, at some point earlier in the semester, I was seriously worried that I was going to fuck something up before all this was over, and I went to a bit of trouble to try and keep that from happening (Note to self: next time, remind yourself about writing a 20 page paper more than two days before the due date--when were you planning to do the research for that paper? The night before it was due?). And yet, I remember none of it. It's hard to believe I thought I was going to forget an entire research paper, especially since I only had one class this semester.

I think I'll go back to rocking now.

Ha. The original start to this post:

"I know, I know. We go through this every year. Every year, Susan processes 35 (36, 37, 38, 39, 40!) years of Christmas, and every year, we have to endure reading about her sad, sad December darkness and how oppressive it is, and how every year she has to work through it and come around to the point where she doesn't hate Christmas and how it's easier now than it was 20 years ago, but still, we have to do re-arrive at that point of acceptance and peace every year, don't we?"

Then I checked this blog and realized I'd either erased all those entries or never wrote them down for public consumption at all, so that first paragraph was pretty superfluous.

Anyway, what I wanted to post was a link to this:



because it forms the basis of one of my happiest Christmas memories, and I like to watch it.